Thus, below, the Official “Blago in the Morning” Coffee* Drinking Game. Because you might as well use the shamed politician’s newfound media legitimacy as an excuse to get…caffeinated.
Take a shot of coffee* every time Blago says:
“my hair”Take two swigs of coffee* every time Blago:
“the people of Illinois”
“that depends on what the definition of is is”
refers to himself in the third personDrink an entire cup of coffee* every time Blago:
makes any reference to Richard Nixon
makes any reference to “you out there in radioland!”
spins anything from REO Speedwagon
uses the word “tresses,” in any context
quotes—again—Rudyard Kipling’s “If”
laughs awkwardlyPour the coffee* on your own lap every time Blago:
crank-calls his own listeners, Morning Zoo-style
spins anything from REO Speedwagon, *and* describes the selection as a “rockin’ number!”
quotes Lewis Carroll’s “The Jabberwocky”
brushes his hair while on the air, describing the process, step-by-step, for listenersAnd there it is. Happy listening. And happy coffee* drinking.
crank-calls his own listeners, Morning Zoo-style…and then caps off the segment with a “you’ve been Blago’ed!”
quotes “There Once Was a Girl from Nantucket”
*Or, you know, whatever you prefer to drink in the morning… Megan Garber is an assistant editor at the Nieman Journalism Lab at Harvard University. She was formerly a CJR staff writer.