“Joe the Forum,” “Joe the Blogger,” “Joe the Shopper”

Joe the Plumber’s latest small business? Apparently: himself. JTP’s deeply researched, carefully edited, thoughtful, and not at all hastily-put-together-to-capitalize-on-his-media-celebrity-before-it-expires treatise on The American Dream—written “with” spiritual novelist Thomas N. Tabback—is slated to be released December 1. Yes, of this year.

Oh, and it will be titled, humbly and rather delightfully, Joe the Plumber: Fighting for the American Dream.

To celebrate—and to ensure that copies of the book are sold!—YOU THE PEOPLE can now obtain a Freedom Membership from Joe’s hastily-put-together-to-capitalize-on-his-media-celebrity-before-it-expires Web site, SecureOurDream.com. The Membership, like Freedom itself, ain’t free…but the $14.95 yearly fee practically pays for itself! With it, you’ll get:

1) Total Access to “Joe The Forum” where you may chat directly with Joe
2) Subscription to the “Joe The Blog” monthly newsletter
3) Free Shipping on all “Joe The Plumber” merchandise
4) Free Signed Copy of Joe’s forthcoming book “Joe The Plumber” - Fighting for the American Dream
5) Become an integral part of an American movement to restore our government to the people

Now, the mere promise of seeing what a blog looks like as a monthly newsletter is probably reason enough to pay $14.95. As is the opportunity to restore our government to the people, and everything. But, me, I’ll wait to give over my credit card number until Joe gets around to filling the currently empty-except-for-the-book “Shop Joe” section of SecureOurDream.com. NB, JTP: Once your Freedom Membership includes a Limited Edition Joe the Plumber Commemorative $1 Coin, Layered in Genuine 24-Karat Gold, my $14.95 will be yours.

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Megan Garber is an assistant editor at the Nieman Journalism Lab at Harvard University. She was formerly a CJR staff writer.