Our economy? It’s sagging. What does that mean? What now?
Well, some things are going to grow and some things are going to shrink. We’re going to see less of some things and more of others.
For example, from the past week:
“Tent cities spread in U.S. as economy sags,” CBS News
Some things will soar:
“Unpaid utility bills soar as economy sags,” USA Today
“Attendance [at Major League Baseball games] soars even as economy sags,” Yahoo! Sports
Some things will boom…
“Business schools expect boom as economy sags,” US News & World Report
…while others, in the face of this sagging, will go bust:
“As economy sags, so do faces…and breasts,” Associated Press
No, our faces (and breasts) aren’t sagging along with the economy just to keep it company (sympathy sagging!) or merely because we’re sad that we have to study for our MBAs in tents. It’s that “many cosmetic surgeons have been seeing a drop-off in costly operations,” something the Associated Press reports that it knows from “anecdotal reports and a recent unscientific survey from an industry trade group.” (Don’t tell me we need to add “story standards” to the list of Things Sagging Along With Economy…)