Last week, we pointed to an object lesson, courtesy of The New York Times, in How Not To Mock the Presidential Nominating Conventions. (In a word: unfunnily.)

Well, the Gray Lady, ever fair, is at it again for this week’s GOP events, publishing, this morning, its satirical—and I use that word loosely—”Republican Convention Schedule.”

Clearly written before we learned that the first day of the St. Paul activities would find Hurricane Gustav ripping through the Gulf Coast—and, apparently, deemed so incisive and bitingly witty that it was published in light of those developments—the piece is, perhaps, even more inane than its Democratic counterpart.

Among the gems:

-“Opening Ceremonies: Special Demonstration by the K Street Precision Lobbying Band”
-“Wednesday, Sept. 3—Theme: ‘Deficits, Schmeficits’”
-“Twenty-one gun salute to diversity (sponsored by the National Rifle Association)”
-“John McCain will arrive at Xcel Center podium via Blackhawk helicopter”

Which…yikes.

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Megan Garber is an assistant editor at the Nieman Journalism Lab at Harvard University. She was formerly a CJR staff writer.